Needless to say, last week was one of those weeks. My car started making a sound. Work was steadily becoming more torturous. Water bugs. Water bug-induced panic attacks. The price of laundry in my building went up $0.25 per load! I’ve been exhausted physically, mentally, and emotionally, and, as we all know, I have to deal with it all by myself.
There were bright spots, of course. There always are! The best of which was a truly excellent second date with a great guy I met just a couple weeks ago. We went out for sushi, which to me is a make or break meal in any relationship. The thing about eating sushi is, sharing is implied. So much is riding on the choice of rolls – does he like spicy tuna?? wiil he make me eat the raw beef sushi (wtf, Texas)?? how many rolls should we order?? It can either end in total chaos or complete sushi harmony.
We handled things perfectly. A great selection of rolls with just enough for us to share without being hungry. My picks were clearly the best ones, which gave me the opportunity to gracefully gloat while also consoling him for his inferior roll selecting abilities. Raw fish bliss. Afterwards, he suggested we go to a bar nearby for drinks. We drank, we laughed, we watched cowboys play Jenga.
It was perfect! Or so I thought…
On Sunday he texted me to basically say thanks, but no thanks. He said it nicely, of course, and it’s not like I could be mad at him about it. I texted him back (as I am always wanting the final word), and said, essentially, back at ya! A clean break. No hard feelings! I have to appreciate that he made it really easy for me to just move on without forever wondering what could have been.
The thing is though, it still sucks. Here’s the deal – dating is always kind of terrible. It’s necessary, and it can be fun, but a lot of the time it is kind of terrible. I just didn’t realize that dating in a new city is even worse! I no longer have any random connections to the guys I meet (OMG! My Best friend’s sister’s neighbor’s dog goes to the same doggie daycare as yours!! – for example). I barely know the city, so, no, I don’t really have a strong opinion on the best tacos/hiking spots/local bands just yet. It’s so much harder to feel that “spark” when the initial connection is basically nonexistent.
I could lie and tell you I laughed this one off no problem, but the truth is, I spent some time crying in my bed alternating between feeling sorry for myself and reminding myself that I can do hard things. Now it’s time to do the hardest thing – get back on the horse, so to speak, and keep playing the field.